Henry John

Journal Entry from January 31, 2016--the brith story of Henry John Beecher, born January 30, 2016 at 12:20 pm. 8 lbs 2 oz and 21.5 inches long. We was initially named James Darwin for about 3 hours... we decided on Henry John by the evening. It just fit.

Oh, Henry. You are snuggled up on your dad right now in the rocking chair of our hospital room. You are so prectious to me. You  have a perfect, round little head and look like such a little football player. I can't get over your new baby smell. I have already smothered the top of your head with 42 million kisses. You met your big sister the eve of your birth. you two will be trouble, I'm sure. You have been super chill, but if you're mad, you let out quite the squawk. Like an eagle. It kills me. So funny. I'm so happy you're here... especially a week-and-a-half early! Yay! You are a beautiful baby--absolutely perfect. Thank you for joining our family. Love you!

Now for the birth story. I have been SO uncomfortable these last few weeks. I was dying for you to come early. At my 38 week appointment, Dr. Chalmers, who I love, by the way--way better than my Dr. with Amelia--has been so supportive of me using the birthing center in the hospital. I was dilated to a 3 at this appointment, and I had Dr. Chalmers sweep my membranes. I so wanted him to come early because Dr. Chalmers was only on-call through the weekend. A new Doc I had only met once and did not like would be on-call all the next week. Friday I felt some light cramping and thought I was losing my mucous plug. But with Amelia, I lost it all at once and then went into labor that day. So I just wasn't sure if this was just spotting from getting my membranes stripped or what. I was pretty down in the dumps Friday night because I just didn't know what to think. Austin took me on a drive to cheer me up around 6 pm and that's when I felt like my cramps started picking up a little. I wanted to feel like "this is it," but I just didn't know what to think. I cramped all night--bad enough to keep me awake, and just barely consistent enough so I couldn't sleep in between. Such a lame night. When I finally got up for the day, my "uterine surges" (hypnobirthing, anyone? ha!) were about 5 minutes apart. I took a hot shower which really helped. After that, we got ready to go for a walk.

By now my contractions were strong enough and about 3 minutes apart that I needed Austin to do counter pressure on my hips through each one. I can't say enough about how much this helped! After some breakfast, I decided I wanted to drive to St. George and then take walks around the temple instead so I could feel close enough to labor and delivery. I listened to my birthing affirmations and rainbow relaxation CD on the way in the car. I have been practicing my breathing and relaxation, and I actually really LOVED this CD. It would put me to sleep almost every time. Ha!

We got to the hospital and headed over to walk the temple grounds. Dr. Chalmers was driving down the street and pulled over to say hi. He cracked a joke about me needing to pick up the pace if I wanted to get labor going. I told him he better stick close by and get ready to come on back. I don't think he realized how serious I was. We didn't make it around the temple even once before I needed to sit on the bench and say a prayer. I was honestly terrified of being turned away. I HATE trying to decide when labor is getting "real." Austin thought I had quite a while to go because of how calm I was through my contractions. He reminded me of how crazy I was with Amelia. He was proud of how well I was handling them. I had been telling him that this time would be different because I was actually trying to prepare myself to deal with my pain in a healthy way. I don't think he really believed me.

Before I go on, I have to talk about the amazing blessing Austin gave me on Friday night. It was very tender, emotional, and just what I needed. I love my husband very much, and going through the birthing experience just makes that love burst. He was so supportive.

So after our prayer, I really needed to pee. That is seriously the only reason we even headed to labor and delivery at this point--just so I could use the bathroom in the lobby. I went and noticed I was bleeding pretty brightly. It scared me, so I had Austin grab our bags from the car, and we headed through the legit doors. I told the nurse how I was feeling, and she said in order to admit me to the birthing suite, I needed to be dilated to a 5. She said she suspected I was probably there or close to it by the way I was breathing. So we headed to check me out. I was praying to be a 5 so I could get soaking in that tub! I have such a thing for bath tubs... She told me that I was at a NINE and 100% effaced. She was shocked. She let me get up so I could move through my contractions, and she kept mentioning how I was not acting like a woman dilated to a 9. Not gonna lie, I was on cloud 9 and started crying tears of joy. They were supposed to get a 20 minute fetal monitoring reading done before admitting me, but there wasn't time. They let me into my birthing suit, a nice queen-sized bed, soaker tub, and just a nice room. But there really wasn't much relaxing going on. This is when everything got frantic. There were so many people around trying to get a fetal monitor going for a few minutes, trying to check me in/admit me to the hospital and get my information entered, and everything else. There was one sweet nurse who knew just what pressure points to push on my back/hips and kept tickling my back (sounds weird, but it really helped keep me relaxed during contractions). Dr. Chalmers showed up. He said, "Shoot, I didn't know you were serious! Serves me right for giving you a hard time out there. You don't mess around." He really had no idea I would be that far along. Ha. He broke my water, and oh man, I was sure I was just peeing and peeing. Such a weird feeling. Contractions got super real at this point. It was a lot harder to stay calm. I had kept insisting that I wanted to get into the tub. My nurse kept trying to tell me that I just didn't have much time--that it would be more like a "dip." But I kept insisting, so I made them run the water. I got in (this is when Shannon and my mom showed up I think). I can't really remember, but I was probably only in that tub for 2 or 3 contractions when I felt like I wanted to push (actually, I think I yelled, "I wanna push!") I'm just not a quiet laborer...

They convinced me to get out of the tub. I don't remember how that happened because I wanted to try and birth in the tub, but it's a good thing I got out because my cervix had some pretty gnarly scar tissue from Amelia's birth that Dr. Chalmers said was rock hard. It wouldn't budge or stretch around baby's head, so Dr. Chalmers had to help pull it up over baby boy. Yeah, that did NOT feel great. It also caused me to tear (Henry was posterior just like Amelia). Chalmers said he only does about one episiotomy per year, but that if there would have been more time, I probably would have gotten one. He thinks my future births will require one. Oh joy. But I'm so grateful for my doc this time around. I really like/trust him. I loved using the birthing center, but was also happy to have my doctor there in the hospital. It was the perfect combo for me. There were pros and cons to that room. Mainly pros, but my major con was that the bed is flat and can't rise up like a hospital bed (the new birthing center will have queen beds that can raise up. Yay! So maybe for next baby...) So, when I was on the bed trying to push while Chalmers helped stretch my cervix, I just wasn't propped up enough. I had such bad heartburn and acid reflux with this pregnancy, and between contractions and pushing, I felt like I was drowning in acid. I didn't have the energy to communicate that, but it made it hard to breathe and catch  my breath for pushing. I can't remember how many contractions I pushed for, but finally that last push and he was here! From the time we walked into the hospital to the time Henry was born, was about an hour. That is insane. 

He was placed right on my chest, and I couldn't believe it. He was such a little chunk compared to Amelia. I 'm still amazed how good it feels when that babe is O-U-T. I barely noticed the doc numbing me up for my stitches. I just felt so much relief and joy. Austin cut the cord and we both just stared at our new baby boy. I actually didn't cry. Not sure why. I think it hit me later in the quiet moments how grateful I was. They didn't bathe him at all in the hospital. I loved that. He got to keep that yummy baby smell for so long! We decided to name him James Darwin for about 3 hours. Then Austin just wasn't feeling it. And I admitted I wasn't really either. We actually didn't make our final decision until that night. But Henry John fits him perfectly. We could have stayed in the birthing center until that night and then gone home to sleep. I just didn't want to go home quite yet, especially since we were still living with my parents which meant Amelia was there. So we transferred to mom/baby for the night. Now I wish I would have just come home. That's my only regret. After being in that super nice birthing suit, a regular hospital room felt so cramped and "hospital-y." I didn't sleep at all, and I think I could have gotten more rest in my own bed at home. Next time...

I am just so happy with this birthing experience compared to Amelia's. Birth is hard. So hard. I just hope my future births go as well as this one. 

That's it for my journal entry. I'm finishing this up exactly one month later.... poor Henry. Being the 2nd child really is tough. I was going through my phone pictures, and there's seriously only like 10 of him since he was born. Amelia had about a billion each day. Oops. But hey, I did get newborns taken, so that's something! Okay, picture time. I LOVED having Shannon there again. She does an absolutely amazing job. She is uber talented, and I'm so grateful she took so much time out of her day to come to the hospital for the birth and later when Amelia came to meet Henry for the first time. Her website is sweetlyphotography.com